You may have heard of children who fail their parents even after giving them the ‘best life’. It happens so often, and sometimes parents do not even know if they are on the right track. Some parents assume that they will use their instincts to mould their children to adults they want them to be. Raising kids varies from one parent to others and depends on factors such as society values, social class and character of the people in question. However, there are some common mistakes that most parents commit irrespective of the approach that one takes.
Responding too fast
Do not get me wrong on this point. There are some situations where your kid will be in danger, and you have to rescue them. However, there are other instances where you have to let them learn how to come up with solutions before you offer help. For instance, your kid claiming to be tired before completing homework does not require your to help. Let him, orher learn how to manage time on their own before your offer help. The modern kid grows up expecting the parent will always come to the rescue and thus grow overdependence syndrome.
It is true that you want only the best for your kid, but sometimes you have to let them experience life. There will be conflicts between your kids and others and taking the side of your young one is not always advisable. Listen to each side and determine the cause of the disagreement before you offer a solution. Do not let your kid know that you will always take his or her side irrespective of the situation. Let the kid learn that the world will not always be fair and sometimes they will be disappointed by the outcomes. Such an approach teaches them to be responsible in all their undertakings.
Let your kids have a say all the time
‘My kids will hate me if I restrain them from doing this and that’. This statement is very common among those parents who want to have the best relationship with their children. However, there are some instances where you have to say no even if this will strain your relationship. You are the adult, and you know the best option for your kids. They may love you for letting them have their way but remember that you are spoiling their future. Let them learn that the world does not always provide for the wishes of the heart.
Not telling the difference between intelligence and maturity
You may have noted that your kid has special ability that is not available in others. There are some that come with talents which puts them in the limelight earlier than others. However, maturity comes with experience and age and not intelligence. Do not confuse the abilities of your kid with maturity because the two are not the same. Teach them how to use their abilities according to their age. It is how they treat others and respond to various situations that matters and not their abilities. Just because your kid is a nerd on the computer field does not mean that he or she can negotiate deals. You need to be available for your kids in every stage of their childhood.
Not leading by example
Do not be that parent who wants the kid to follow a certain route whereas you are in the opposite direction. Children learn through emulation, and you are the first person they come into contact with. It will be of no use lecturing your kids on the effects of drug abuse when you use them at their presence. Curiosity will lead them to try out the kind of lifestyle that you lead as well. If you want them to spend more time playing outside, then you have to lead by example. There are some quite interesting ways that you can make this happen. Before you take any actions, ask yourself how it is likely to affect the well-being of kids.
You can avoid the above mistakes and give your kids and a good childhood and still shape their future. There may be other mistakes depending on the specific situation, and that is why solutions may differ.